Day +4

Sunday November 14, 1:30 AM

> So I got to go home today for 6 hours. I wasn't sure how many more times I
> would be able to get a day pass so I tried to make this day count. I
> watched TV, and fell asleep in my own bed for a while. It's really good
> that I'm getting all these things important things out of the way before I
> get sick again.
>
> As you can tell, I'm rather disappointed with my visit home. I really wish
> I had done more today, but all I wanted to do is sleep. I was also having
> another problem. Everywhere I looked, all I could see were dirty objects
> that I wasn't allowed to touch. Don't get me wrong, my house was spotless
> when I walked through the door, but I seemed to have developed a fear of
> public places. I'm worried that someone is going to sneeze on me and make
> me sicker than I have to be. I kind of feel like John F Kennedy near the
> Schoolbook Depository when I walk outside. I imagine little animated bugs
> like in the RAID commercials hiding in the shadows just waiting to get me.
> OK, I might be going a little "dramatic" with my comparisons, but there
> definitely is a fear associated with being outside. My hospital room has
> become my sanctuary. In there, I feel like I'm in a safe little bubble where
> nothing can hurt me. I realize I've always been an introvert, since I can
> spend days in my hospital room and be perfectly happy, so we'll see how much
> I enjoy the next three weeks.
>
> I also have an announcement regarding the status of my various arcade
> accomplishments
>
> Super Mario Sunshine - Finished
>
> Classic NES "Legend of Zelda" - Beaten level one and three. I cannot find
> the level 2 fortress in Zelda. Found all the other levels but I'm trying to
> play in order.
>
> I'm in the market for a Game cube game that's baseball oriented. If anyone
> knows of a good title for Game cube baseball, please let me know.
>
> I have one final thought for the day and then I'm going to go to bed. I am
> currently detached from all cords, pumps, IV bags, tubing, and accessories,
> without counting my central line implant. I was able to walk around, run up
> the stairs, and just be me for one day. The doctor's say that they're going
> to try and switch up all my medicines to pills and drinkable liquid. My
> only job is to drink enough water to stay detached from the IV. It's also
> easier to relax mentally when you don't have tubes and pumps that follow you
> around. I actually think I'm all better today simply because I don't need
> an IV.
>
> This game is turning out to be much more mental than I thought. I realized
> this last week when a simple bout of vomiting had me on the ground. You're
> body can be as tough as it wants, but the fight belongs to the mind. I want
> to thank everyone for their support, and their constant flow of emails. I
> know that I don't get back to anyone, but please note that I read every
> letter that comes in. If I get a few letters asking the same question, I'll
> write a few words on that topic.
>
> I'm running out of thoughts to write about at this second. If anyone out
> there has a question they would like answered, just send me an email and
> I'll address the question in the next journal entry I do.
>
> And don't worry folks, the gory stuff will come back next week when my new
> bone marrow starts engrafting. On deck for next week's entries are stories
> on hair loss, severe fevers, infections and mouth sores.
>
> It's 1:30 am and I'm going to bed.